Showing posts with label current events. Show all posts
Showing posts with label current events. Show all posts
credit: wikipedia

barack's wife. malia and sasha's mom. craig's sister. forever first lady. michelle obama.

princeton and harvard grad.

motivator. 

strong.

beautiful. 

writer. 

i'm currently reading michelle obama's memoir, becoming. i'll have a full review over at bit.ly/PageBedtime before the year is out. but i had to take a moment to share some thoughts the nation's former first lady. long before her book was published, political pundits, journalists and every day citizens alike were speculating whether she would eventually run for office. 

i've heard her response to this, it has been a resounding no

yet, she is continually asked. i just got frustrated on her behalf the other day, which prompted this blog post. i doubt any more than a handful of people will read this, but i will feel better for writing it. i feel a sense of obligation because while michelle was campaigning for barack and also while in office, she has regarded the military and especially their families with great care and concern. (my navy veteran cousin's wife met her and witnessed this in person.) so, i kinda wanted to pay some of that back with this writing.  

when michelle acknowledged that the whole family is part of the military experience, i felt validated as an army brat of 15 years. as my friends can attest, i'll often speak of my time as a child as when "we were in the army," because michelle obama is exactly right - the whole family serves. the whole family is shuffled around. the whole family has to make new friends every 2-3 years. the whole family has to miss holidays with extended family members. the whole family serves. it's a little easier today with the advances in technology, but it was brutal when i was a child. 14 schools. 13 grades plus college - 14 different schools. i don't have a 5th grade school photo because we moved from one place before school photos were taken and arrived at the new school after they'd already been taken. being a military brat provides a unique life experience, albeit a challenging one. (i still have trouble answering the question: where are you from?)

i feel a sort of kinship with the obamas - especially their daughters. i understand what it is like to be the daughter of a parent who has made a career of serving this country. if, after my dad retired, my mom said she wanted to enlist, i would have just about died. while serving from the white house is vastly different from serving as an enlisted army soldier, there are some similarities. sometimes both parents and their offspring want to serve (e.g., the clintons, the bush family). but michelle has made it clear that she does not want to run, and we should stop asking her. she's answered. no means no. she's served. her daughters have served. her mother, to a degree, has served. there are other qualified leaders. we should be thankful for their service because, i'd suspect, running the country also provides a unique but challenging life experience. 

let's transfer our passion to the next generation of leaders.  


yesterday i got pulled over by a grand prairie police officer ... and it was largely uneventful.

with the current state of police relations, we often see the varying extremes of interactions with the police. -- those very damaging exchanges where some unarmed person ends up dead or the really heartwarming experiences that make us smile and maybe even laugh. those make the news because they are ... well, newsworthy.

i don't get pulled over often. and before yesterday, my last experience with a dfw-area police officer in 2012 wasn't the most pleasant. (as a side note, i just re-read this post and realized i got pulled over about three years ago for the same thing sandra bland was killed for in 2015. re-reading that was more than sobering.)

except from 3/21/12:
about two weeks ago i was stopped in irving because i looked suspicious driving the lexus i own and drive daily in dfw. the police officer pulled me over for allegedly not signaling as i changed lanes (i am pretty sure i did, but even if i didn't, no one gives tickets for that in dfw). once stopped he proceeded to question me about where i was going (home), who i was following (no one) and if my name was really melyssa (yes, that is my legal name on my birth certificate and everything). once i showed him my credentials he let me go with a simple, "drive safe!"

fast-forward to 2017. my niece and i were driving home from dallas. i had helped out at her school field trip at the perot museum. yes, me, the PANK, with a group of 9 and 10 year old girls. do i really have to tell you how tired i was?

so, i'm cruising down i-20, and i guess i was cruising a little too fast. the gppd pulled me over for going about 10 miles over the speed limit. i really felt like i was going with the flow of traffic, but again, i was exhausted, so i probably wasn't at peak awareness. as he pulled me over, he communicated with me through the passenger window so as to keep himself out of harm's way. i already had my credentials out when he approached. he asked me where i was going, and i told him, "i'm headed home. i have my niece in the back (pointing to her as she waves from the back seat) and we are heading home from her school field trip at the perot museum." he explains why he has pulled me over. i reply, "ok. i felt like i was going with the flow of traffic. but ok."

he goes back to his car and returns after a few minutes. and he says, "can you roll down the passenger window?" to which i just kinda gave him this look like, "why?" and then he said, "is it ok if i give your niece a sticker?" and i said, "oh! sure, of course." so, he gave her the sticker and he gave me a warning. and all was right with the world. not because i didn't get a ticket (if you read my 2012 post, i didn't get a ticket then either). all was right with the world because we communicated with MUTUAL respect. even if i had received a ticket yesterday, that would have been a fair experience.

for me, both events will remain etched in my memory for years to come (partly because i've memorialized them on this blog.) and this is because your actions and your words matter. but what's even better is my 10-year old niece witnessed a positive exchange, which will shape her experiences as she gets older.

so, yesterday was no big deal. it's probably not even worth a blog post, but i wanted to share because as with most things in life we tend to accentuate the very positive or the very negative and the everyday run-of-the-mills things often get overlooked.

yesterday was a good, uneventful day.



on june 18th, a hate-filled person tried to steal the joy of the charleston community, and arguably, the joy of many people across our nation. he did not win. we are sad. but the joy we have wasn't given by the world and it can't be taken away by evil, worldly actions. perhaps if he had been listening and receiving in that bible study rather than allowing the devil to take hold, he would have known this. 

am i sad about this event? yes. am i angry? yes. am i shocked? yes, i'm shocked, too. there should be some places where we can feel safe; at peace. while i feel all of these things, i will not be moved. and you should not be either. continue to pray. continue to worship ... together. we are bigger than this. we cannot let the terrorists win. in every crisis, there is good. look for the good. look for the helpers. look to the light. 

i pray for our country. i pray for our leaders to help restore and maintain order. i pray for charleston. i pray for the victim's families. and i pray that when those nine souls went to be with the Father, He welcomed them with open arms and said, "well done." 





each year, at about the same time the coveted oscar winners are announced, the razzies also announce the worst films of the year. it's supposed to be a bit of a joke. many people who have won razzies have also won an oscar or two. i don't really put much stock into awards season because i think many of the awards are distributed (yes, distributed not earned) based on politics. however, i was a bit disappointed to see that “annie” was labeled the worst remake by the razzies.

the story of annie is not new nor are the characters. however, the faces of the some of the characters look vastly different than the 1982 version. for some people, this is a point of pain and discomfort. for me, the aunt and caregiver of an 8-year old, cute, brown-faced girl, it is a welcomed change.

image credit: forbes.com

i took my niece to see this movie in the theater and she absolutely loved it. and from what i've heard from other parents, my niece was not the only little girl who enjoyed the movie. as of today, the film has grossed $85 million, making a little over $20 million (imdb.com). so from a marketing perspective, it was a bit of a success.

and if you do put any stock into those award shows, it was nominated for two golden globes.

but from a social perspective, i think this film is so much more important than any award. to watch my niece's eyes light up at seeing someone (and might i add that someone is the youngest oscar nominee in history to date) on the big screen that looks like her is priceless to me. just like graham moore, who picked up the award from best adapted screenplay this year, said in his acceptance speech (and i'm paraphrasing) to those who think they are weird and don't fit in, keep pushing because they can achieve similar success. he also challenged them to push others when they do get there. many lauded moore for his comments. similarly, little brown-faced girls need to see people who look like them achieve successes so they know it is, indeed, a possibility.

will my niece be an oscar-nominated actress one day? i don't know, but it's certainly in her spectrum of possibilities now. i pray and hope that she will be successful at whatever she does. i speak those words into her all the time, but it's nice to have hollywood reinforce some of those beliefs.

so, you can have your razzies and you can make your fun. but (grammy-winner) jay-z, (oscar-nominated) will & jada smith, (oscar-winner) jamie foxx, and (oscar-nominated) quvenzhane wallis - you are all winners in my book for putting a diverse (not a black cast, a diverse one) cast on the big screen.


"george bush doesn't care about black people." 

last night as i watched the largely unsurprising grand jury verdict unfold and as i listened to the smug allegations and rationale made by the ferguson prosecutor, i was saddened. then, like a lot of people, i logged on to various social media accounts, and i was even more saddened. many people were encouraging others to get registered to vote to help affect change. and by and large, the overwhelming response was that voting is pointless.

i refuse to believe this. change does happen in this country. we are far from where we need to be, but we are not where we used to be. and that is because of many before us who constructively protested, worked with others to push for changes, and ... voted. frankly, we cannot win by doing what the media portrays. the looting, the breaking of windows, the fighting - that will get us nowhere. we've got to learn "their" game, get in it, and play it to our advantage.

that includes voting.

that includes communicating with our dollar.

that includes writing to local politicians.

sadly, that means we have to tell our children that, today, their lives mean less.

that means we have to prepare ourselves and our children for the very real possibility that when we leave our homes, we may be slaughtered.

but i do believe we can change the climate by playing the game and beating "them" at it.

"george bush doesn't care about black people." we all remember who said that little phrase. the reality of the matter is black people don't care about black people. we know better. we have more tools now. we must do better. because waiting for "them" to do better on "their" own is not living our lives to the fullest, which is what we are called to do.

stop hurting your own community. be different.


my head - about 6 inches from cheek to cheek.

my chest - about 16 inches from shoulder to shoulder.

as a reflect on this horrible, avoidable michael brown killing in ferguson, missouri, i am saddened. i am frustrated. i am angry. i am pissed. and i have questions.

why was he shot 6 times? what was he shot twice in the head when the chest/arms are easier, more survivable targets? why was he shot at all? as my brother-in-law so eloquently put it - there's more than one tool on a police belt. why go for the gun? i understand some are arguing that he was a criminal - stealing a ~$50 box of cigars. but did that really warrant his death?

here are some more numbers related to me. i have 7 uncles and aunts on my mom's side of the family. those relatives had 14 children; 6 of whom are male - black males. most of whom i consider brothers more so than cousins. so, this story is personal to me.

of those 6 black males; 2 served this country. 1 works for the government. and the other 3 are gainfully-employed, upstanding citizens. it's terrifying to think what could happen to one of them because they look a certain way to a certain type of person. they have been harassed but by the grace of god, they have not been slaughtered, and i pray every day for their protection.

another (illogical) argument, the black community should not be enraged about the michael brown shooting because there's more black-on-black crime daily. perhaps the statistics support that, but it does nothing to alleviate the rage. frankly, the black community should not be the only community upset about this.

"injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." -dr. martin luther king

so, now is the time for everyone to be angry, to be upset, to be pissed. but channel that anger into something positive. register to vote, so jury selection can be more psychologically and demographically diverse. mentor youth in your neighborhood. talk to your children about how to be safe - even from the people who are paid to keep us safe. set a good example and beat the stereotype. every life is precious and valuable. the same anger we had when natalie holloway was murdered and robbed of her chance to go to college should be the exact same anger we have for the michael brown situation. cause you know, he, too, was on his way to college.


for the past several hours, I've watched the media, celebrities and even my friends (via social media) berate a certain young actress/musician for her "performances" at last night's mtv video music awards.

while i don't condone or promote her behavior, i am saddened by how quickly society has acted and attacked said celebrity. this societal behavior illustrates just how pervasive and systemic these type of insensitive comments have become.

we're disconnected
while we have become more and more connected with mobile devices, social media and technology overall; our connections are shallow. we've stopped having meaningful conversations. we've stopped caring. we're worse than the non-participants in the kitty genovese attack. instead of turning a blind eye and a deaf ear hoping someone else will deal with the issues, we engage in halfheartedly casting judgement from our proverbial soap boxes guised as our social media profiles.

the golden rule
what if, instead, we looked beyond the outer layer and tried to empathize? what if we sought to understand why people act such ways? what if we offered help and encouragement instead of spewing hurtful words and castigation?
image credit: rattigon
if we can so easily cast judgement and assign harsh words to celebrities, it makes it a little easier to understand why private citizens choose to attack our schools and workplaces. until we start learning how treat each other with compassion, we cannot expect to live in a compassionate society.

one love,
melyssa



image credit: zirconicusso
 it's an ugly word with an ugly past, and it's been the topic of many social and political debates for decades. dick gregory wrote a book about it. richard pryor vowed to stop using it after a trip to africa. chris rock tried to define it by applying it to people who exhibit a certain type of behavior. and a couple of years ago, the word was (in theory) put to rest, buried by the naacp.

nigger.

the media attempts to soften it by saying "the n-word." but if we are honest with ourselves, we're talking about the racial epithet often applied to african americans, always in a negative manner.

nigger.

in the past couple of weeks, we've seen this word rear its ugly head in the mainstream media. first the k-mart commerical parody about knickers. and now, paula deen has admitted to using the word. to be frank, well i'll be melyssa, but seriously - are we really surprised that an old woman from the south has used nigger in the past?

frankly, i think african americans and society as a whole, are blowing this a bit out of proportion. i noticed that many of my facebook friends shared the k-mart commercial on their respective walls and found it funny and hilarious. but the recent news about paula deen has resulted in very negative emotions. she's been lambasted in the media, particularly by african americans.

in my opinion, the word nigger is deplorable. i do not use it in my daily vernacular. but i also believe that as an (african american) community and as a (general) society - until we all stop using it - in music, on movies, during general conversation, etc., it's a bit unfair to harshly judge someone who is being honest about having used the word in the past.

there's no need to facilitate a publicity stunt with a burial of the word. i think we should all just agree to say no to words whose meaning is only meant to be derogatory.

so, i ask you - have you used the word nigger (or possibly another derogatory term to describe a group of people)? do you think the word should be banned? will we see a day when nigger is not used at all? or do you think this is part of america's history and destined to be part of its future?




last tuesday, i celebrated my birthday. one of the greatest gifts i received was the news of those three young ladies in cleveland being found alive. for 10 years, they were hidden in plain sight and no one noticed. that saddened me.

when i think about how much privacy we've given up over the years. we practically undress at the airport. but the release of our personal rights is not exclusive to travel post-9/11. in our everyday lives, we take pride in sharing personal information about ourselves. we post our innermost and sincere thoughts on facebook and she share up-to-the-minute details about our lives on twitter. and we peak into the lives of others as well. we are always connected but rarely connecting with others. there's a breadth of communication tools but a lack of depth in content. 

we need to start really talking to each other other. we need to start taking notice. we need to start communicating again. and if we notice that something doesn't seem right or make sense, we should go with our gut. ask questions, speak up, call the authorities - as often as needed. 

i am thankful for the stories of hope we find in miss berry, miss dejesus, miss knight, miss dugard, miss smart, mr. hornbeck, mr. stayner and others. i wish all children were safe with their parents. but until that happens, i implore you to open your eyes, get to know your neighbors and co-workers. help bring home those who are still missing like miss coldon

hope is a good thing. let's also be active as a community outside of social media.

communicate. one love.

Photo by FreeDigitalPhotos.net



just kidding, but you know what they say. in every joke is a little nugget of truth. early voting has started in texas. i performed my civic duty this morning, and i hope you will too. be sure to vote for the right guy though.


so, i haven't had a news rant in a while.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12309606/

BENTON, Tenn. - Using traps baited with honey buns and doughnuts, officials Friday tried to track down a black bear that killed a 6-year-old girl and critically injured her mother and 2-year-old brother.

The family had been at a pool below a waterfall in the Cherokee National Forest on Thursday afternoon when the bear attacked, the Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency said.

Witnesses said the bear snatched up the boy in its mouth as the mother and other visitors tried to fend it off with sticks and rocks, said Dan Hicks, a spokesman for the agency.

The 6-year-old girl ran away but was later found dead about 100 yards down the trail, with a bear standing over her, authorities said.

"Allegedly, after the rescue squad found the little girl, one of the squad members fired a shot from a small caliber handgun," Hicks said Friday. "We don't know whether the bear was hit or not. There was no blood, but it chased it off."

Mother too injured to talkOfficials were still trying to piece together exactly what happened to spur the attack, forestry spokeswoman Sharon Moore said.

Both the mother and boy were listed in critical condition Friday at a Chattanooga hospital, but Hicks said both are expected to recover.

Hicks said the boy had puncture wounds on his head and claw marks on his body. The mother also suffered puncture wounds when she was picked up and dragged by the bear.
"We have not been able to talk to her. She may not remember the attack at all," Hicks said.

The little girl's body was taken to a mortuary in Cleveland, funeral home owner Ralph Buckner said. He declined to release her identity and no family members were at the funeral home. Authorities have also declined to release the names but have said the family was from Ohio.

The attack occurred in an isolated mountainous area, 10 miles from the nearest highway, in the 640,000-acre national forest, which runs along the Tennessee-North Carolina line southwest of Great Smoky Mountains National Park.

Authorities first tried to search the rugged terrain for the bear but called off that effort early Friday to concentrate on trying to trap the animal in a 1,000-acre area around the campground.

"We may never find it," Hicks said. "It may be on the top of another mountain by now."

If found, bear will be killedAuthorities are asking anyone who was at the campground and saw the attack to come forward because witness accounts could help find the bear. If the animal is captured it will be killed so tests can be done to determine if it was ill.

"It's a pretty rare thing, black bears generally don't attack people. I can't think of any time other than — just really rare circumstances," said Monty Williams, park ranger.

The campground had only six of its 88 campsites filled at the time of the attack, officials said. Terry McDonald of the U.S. Forest Service said the family members were believed to be day visitors, not overnight campers.

The campground was evacuated after the attack and the witnesses have now scattered, Hicks said.

Hicks said there have been 42 bear sightings in the area in the past couple of weeks, but this is the time of year when bears are usually active.

In May 2000, a woman was killed by a black bear near Gatlinburg. Glena Ann Bradley, a schoolteacher from Cosby, was attacked by two female bears when she took a walk on a trail near a Smoky Mountains campground.
© 2006 The Associated Press.

this story is reminiscent of the girl in hawaii who was attacked by a shark and lost her arm. later the shark was hunted and killed.

first of all, i've never understood how they know they are getting the correct animal. but when we, as a society, put away thousands of innocent human beings in prison and on death row, what can i expect for animals. i also don't understand how is it fair for people to go into an animal's environment and kill them for doing what animals do. sharks are predators. bears are going to defend themselves when they feel threatened.

i think back to the "gun-totin' grandma" here in dfw a few months back. a man broke into her house and she felt scared and threatened because her granddaughter was at home with her. without hesitation she got her gun and non-fatally shot the perpetrator. her voice was heard around the world as her granddaughter was on the phone with 911. she said (paraphrase), "don't you move. don't get up or i'll shoot you again." she was hailed a heroine. but the bear ... when found (if it's the right or wrong one) is going to be killed.

something about this just seems very wrong and hypocritical.